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Red Letters

27 April 1985
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  • smearedshit@livejournal.com
Hello. My name is Marissa.

I am 21 years old, 5'3, and weigh 108 lbs. I am a painter.

My hair use to be long and black, now it's short and brown.

I believe that I am as ordinary as ordinary gets. No weirdness, no eccentricity, just a simple and ordinary person living in a world of absurdities.

This Spring, I am suppose to find my soul somewhere during my visit in the Mediterranean. My neighbor, who is this old, but supposedly middle-aged, Polish lady, read my fortune and said that specifically this Spring, something is suppose to come into being.

I asked her if it was lover, she said perhaps. I asked her if it was a child, she said maybe. I asked her, am I going to die? She said no.

I am also a hypochondriac in denial.......

and an inverted insomniac. I usually sleep during the day, and stay awake at night, but now, I find myself sleeping at 7 am and waking up in an hour, and remaining awake for the next 23 hours.

I read a lot.. but not a lot of garbage, unless it's so bad, it's funny.

I am completely in love with a man. I live with him, but I really do think that he doesn't know I exist, that I am just some girl that makes him cheese sandwiches every morning. He doesn't even know my name, but once he did say Marble to me.. but I realized he was telling me to pass him his cigarettes. Anyway, these letters are meant for him.

'My heart is rusty. My fingers are clean.'

but somehow he manages to tell me that I am beautiful every Friday night.

He also tells me that the female orgasm is a myth.

~ If you want to know me, add me.